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Friday, October 13, 2017

What Happens When You Put Sex First

Kind of a compelling and interesting post title - right?

It's been a while since I posted. Maybe I lost my MoJo or my writer's inspiration or frankly, nothing has happened in my life recently that's worth writing about.

Because that's kinda what this blog is all about - a documentary of my life experiences, learnings and missives.

And while 2016 was the Year of Living Dynamically -

http://willsonwheels.blogspot.com/2016/12/2016-year-of-living-dynamically.html

I can't say the same of 2017.

It's obviously not over yet but I guess if I had to classify it or label it, I might call it the "Year of Pain and Resolution".

That old nemesis of mine - Mr Pain - has returned - in more ways than one.

A bone to bone left shoulder, lower back and an overly used and abused right knee has me in constant pain along with additional new pains in my right elbow, wrist and hand.

Perhaps that's why my social life has not been so Stellar this year.  I simply don't have the desire or energy to venture out and spend energy and time meeting and getting to know someone.

I don't venture into the world of on-line dating perhaps believing stupidly that if something is gonna happen, it should happen in a random and unexpected way - a chance meeting planned and perpetrated by the powers that bring 2 people together.

Or some such bullshit as that.

Anyway, let me get back on track and relate a little experience that happened to me recently and what I learned or should I say re-learned from it.

A couple of months ago, I was doing a night walkabout in the Santa Fe Plaza and had made a passthrough at the La Fonda checking out the band.  I was exiting onto the street and there were 2 ladies in front of me.  Naturally, I opened the door for them, as is required from a Texas boy under any circumstances.

I don't remember the exact opening line of the conversation that ensued as I was about to go my merry and solitary way, but the tall redhead of the pair said....

"I just want you to know you're beautiful and I've been stalking you for the last 2 years."

Well - you can imagine the potential options, responses and reactions that blew up in my head when I heard this.

First - Holy Shit - do I run, fight, play dumb, ignore her or just play along for the fun of it?

You know me - I ain't got the sense God gave an ant regarding women so I just stopped and turned around and said something to the effect....

"Oh really.  And what would possess you to be stalking me?"

And as I said this, I got my first really good look at this lady.

First off, I was looking eye to eye with her which was blue eye to green eye - or maybe I was looking up at her slightly cause this woman was an Amazon - and the glowing, predator like green eyes were framed by long, flowing Rapunzel red hair...

And the first thing I thought was - Fuck Dude - if you know what's good for you, you will just Run not Walk away from this Beast as fast as you can.

But like the Son of Zeus trying to avoid the death wielding gaze of Medusa, I paused.

Maybe it was Curiosity.... Maybe it was Ego.... Maybe it was Stupidity.

I don't know but I paused long enough to have a conversation with this lady and wing woman in which I learned she had been shadow dancing with my oblivious ass several times and she and her sidekick were convinced I was some European / Scandinavian visitor to the Southwest.

Hearing this I figured - Fine I'll just throw a Curve Ball back at this lady and get rid of her real quick knowing how Santa Fe women loathe Texas men so with my best Texas drawl I responded....

"No Ma'am - I'm not from Europe.  I'm about as much of a Deep East Texas Red Neck as you'll ever meet".

Well damned if that didn't add fuel to the fire cause the lady responded....

"OMG - Your voice and the way you talk does not match how you look.  I had imagined that you would be a stuck up European guy but you're not that way at all".

Anyway, this lady proceeded to tell me things on this first chance encounter on the street that made it pretty obvious that the only thing she was interested in was having sex with me.

So - counter to my conservative nature and moral and ethical viewpoints on such matters - I rolled with it.

I told her "You know - I really appreciate how direct and straightforward you are in expressing yourself.  You make me curious and that hasn't happened in a long time".

So I got her name and number and then went my merrier way.

Cue up Hurricane Harvey and a 3-week stint in Texas with my social return to Santa Fe beginning with a late night visit to Boxcar to dance with a friend of mine.

Upon walking in to Boxcar, what do I see but the Tall, Crazy Red Headed Bitch (and I haven't used the term Crazy Bitch for a long time) sitting on a chair looking straight at me with those laser green eyes and a smile that looked like an Alpha Female Wolf gazing at a helpless Piggie in a Pen.

So true to my Defiance in the face of Death Nature (think Mouse throwing a Middle Finger at a Descending Eagle scenario), I flashed my best Texas smile and strode straight over to her and planted the most passionate, wet kiss on her that I could summon.

The look of shock and surprise that I saw on her face was a clear indicator that she realized in a micro moment that I was no Victim in any situation especially one that involved a physical encounter with any Man, Woman or Beast.

And also true to my nature of being a guy that dances with who brung him, I danced the night with the friend I came with, excluding the She Wolf from any satisfaction of preference - which probably added more fuel to her fire of intended sexual conquest.

What ensued in the following week is not something I will disclose in detail but will reveal in context.

I gave the Lady what she wanted - which was a couple of sexual encounters with the Fantasy she had made up in her mind - only this was her Fantasy in the Flesh.

I wouldn't say it was anti-climactic because there were many climaxes involved but I will say, that based on the comments from my Stalker, she may have gotten more than she bargained for.

Because I don't give of myself so Freely so Easily.

The Balance of Consequences of getting close to me even for a brief time may not be so easy to ignore or dismiss as was this Woman's admission.  Or maybe she was just trying to let me down easy.

Her Truth or True Motivations will likely never be known.

As encounters of this Nature are likely to resolve themselves, it ended before it started.

Because the consequences or rewards of putting sex first are revealed when the subsequent risks are realized.

As I have often lamented, it takes Time to get to know someone and what lies beneath.

Shortcutting this process bypasses acknowledgement of and familiarization with the Involved Individuals' Past and their Path to the Present - which is likely Everything that it is Important in knowing and understanding that Person for, despite our unwillingness to admit it -

We are Products of our Past.  Our History, while not a Plotter of our Future, is an influence on it.

Do I regret my momentary lapse in Past Protocol of this Kind?  Do I feel bad about it?  Am I angry about being used for some woman's short term made up fantasy?

No - No - No

I am a grown ass 55 year old man who is responsible for his own actions.

And being 55, I have to follow my Mantra of Making Memories and not Recording Regrets.

And this experience was a Memory Maker in my Continuing Journey of....

Discovery.

As my Momma once told me....

Be careful of what you wish for cause you might get it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j-qQ_brIsfY

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