Donations to Discovery

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

I Write You Poems.... And You Just Say Good-bye

I Wondered and I Pondered
At the end
Of each new day
Until the Wondering became Wandering
And I had Lost My Way.

I looked to the Stars above me
And asked them "Why don't You Love Me?"
And found that with each day's passing
What the Day was lacking
Was the Touch of Your Hand on Me.

I smiled at the Sun
As it slipped away from Me
And when all the Days are Done
With the Final Settling of this Son
All they will do is cover me
And say the words in Eulogy
The will of Wills is at the End
Of His Day of Discovery.

And as Life throws its Dirt over Me
On My Last Day of Discovery
I Wonder
Then I Ponder
What New Life will Become of Me.

I thought I needed a Little Collaborator
As my Life's Fabricator
So I gave my Life to You
I made a Wife of You
I wrote You Poems...
And You just said Good-bye.

So many nights I hung above Her
Trying to be her Best Lover
But it was a Finish before the Start
Because My Lover I Suffer
From Numbness of the Heart.

You call me Gay
Because that's the Only Way
To show Who I Am
And How I Am
To the World Around Me
And Those that Down Me.

You are My Black Hole
And I am Your Super Nova
So when I pass over
The Stars cry for us
On our Journey to the Nebulus.

I was hanging by the thread between us
That's what everybody said when they seen us
I knew I was from Mars and You was from Venus
But that didn't matter
When I came into Your Planet
And You came on my Penis.
But I knew that it was Over
When You called Me Lover
The Day I wrote You Poems
And You chose Another.

So now I feel my Life is Moot
Wearing the same old Starched Suit
With Pen and Paper by my bed
I write these thoughts of You
That fill my weary head.

I decided to turn my Short for You
Into a Long for Me
But realized real quick
We ain't on the same Journey
And that Love ain't Fair
And its Fare ain't Free
But You looked at Me
And said - What do I see
But a Dirty White Boy
With a Dirty White Boy Fantasy.

Just Like My Life
My Thoughts ain't Easy
And sometimes Sleazy
With a little Tap to my Rap
And the right words Missing from My Melody.

Yep - My thoughts are Flyers
That turn into Liars
So that when I sleep
I awake from the deep
And make love with my Admirers.

I don't know where to go
When there's no way to flow
So I stand in the street
With my face to the heat
And just know that I don't know.

She told me - I don't want your Love
I just want your Money
I lived with your Pain
And let me tell you Honey
That the Mean of Living with You
Ain't worth the Meaning of Loving You.

So I turned to her in bed and said
I think Baby that perhaps and just maybe
You missed the Part from the Start
That You would Part from my Heart
And leave Me with just Me
Standing and Stranding Abandoned.

It's OK - I wrote this script
From a Tragedy that was ripped
From a Book of Love and Pain
And a Mind so Muttered and Cluttered
That the Only Hope was the Dope
That all the Soap would Clean the Stain.

And after all the Chatter, it really doesn't Matter
Why I don't come and you come first
For who is first is not who's worst
Cause it's not what counts when the bed goes bounce
But that One's still in Love when the Other leaves town.

So when you forgot me after you rocked me
I knew it was best after the test
We talked the day and you walked away
Leaving me Alone with my own Bone
I thought that You loved Me
But You had your own Recovery
On the Road to Discovery.

Is there longing after leaving
After pleasing in the season
Then it's all good between you and I
When I wrote you poems
And you said good-bye.

You know I keep to myself
Cause it's best for my health
For when One becomes Two
Then Red turns to Blue
And Past becomes Prologue
When this Act is through.

You say You're such a Nice Guy
A Clean and Funny White Fly Guy
I really think you're Gay
But I'll Fuck You anyway
Yeah I know You Don't Care
Because Life ain't Fair.

So when the Friendship ends
And the Love begins
You'll remember what I told you
That I didn't want to hold you
Because I knew the Heat between us
Would leave with that Cold You.

I gave you my Time and I gave you my Rhyme
And you gave me What? when you were leaving
I saw it coming before you were going
Because between all the hard crashing and all the easy flowing
There was just Me and You and only You was knowing
That my Crazy Past would never let things last
But was you looking at my Past or just looking at my Behind
That Tells the Time
Of a Man in a Shell that's been through Hell
Left with Nothing but Scars
And Wounds that won't Heal
So when you act on what you feel
And you tell me that it's Real
Just understand that for Me to be Your Man
You'll have to have Walked where I Walked
To Stand where I Stand.

And all I ever wanted
Was to write you poems
And for you never to say Good-bye.

Sunday, November 12, 2017

A Message to Maryland

Good Morning.

I wanted to share some thoughts with you this morning and they may eventually find themselves in a post (and they did obviously).

In the aftermath of extraordinary events in my Life, I like to take time to ask -


Why did this happen to me?

Why did You come into my Life?

And sometimes the answer to Why is less important than what happens during the event or the outcome or where you end up in your Life after the event has concluded.

And what happened during the event was Incredible, Spontaneous and Unexpected -

Friendship, Companionship, Commonality, Conversation, Fun and Intimacy.

And where did I end up after experiencing this?

On a higher, more fragile plane of Appreciation of Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.

You brought me out of a Cave of Isolation with your Consistent Desire for my Company.

You Will'd me into being Wills again.

A more fun-loving, easy going guy that laughs more and cries easier and Lives and Loves Life -

And the One he is with....

With passion.

And thinks more and writes more about what he is thinking because there is suddenly more to Think About.

And while we are nearly 2000 miles apart, I am in a better place now....

Because of You.

Thank You Maryland!

Saturday, November 11, 2017

Food Prep’g and Eating for the Wade’s Army Fight against Neuroblastoma Competition at Praxis

1st meal of the day.

Stacking some big protein in with veggies and fruit and a little fat.

Beginning the prep for tomorrow's Wade's Army Support the Fight against Neuroblastoma competition at Praxis.

Grilled Ahi Tuna with a side sauce of honey mustard, sour cream, balsamic, olive oil, kikkoman and Worcetshire, butternut squash, kale, fruit salsa, grilled pineapple and a Super Salad.

It was a 1.2# tuna fillet so will eat half now and half for supper.

I haven't eaten until 3 - 4 the last 2 Days. Wanted to lean down a little for the competition.

And yesterday all I ate was 2 salads and a 3 oz piece of pork sausage.

So how do you balance lean with strength and endurance calories before a competition?

Don't know - never done it before.

But I want to err on the side of looking good vs being good.

With that said, I'm actually carb pre-loading a bit having restricted myself on carbs for the last couple of days. I will have rice, sweet potato and the rest of the butternut squash tonight which has lots of good slow release carbs.

This should fill my liver and muscles with glycogen and I will eat again in the morning before the comp.

My muscles should look full and be full and ready when we start doing the WODs.

So that's the logic.

Leftovers for the evening meal.

 And the link to the Wade's Army website for more information.

Donate if you can and come by and watch and support the athletes and support the cause at Praxis tomorrow.

Call us: 505-699-8856
Address: 3221 Richards Lane, Suite B, Santa Fe, NM 87507
First heat starts at 9:00 am.

It'll be a great opportunity to see other people experience a lot of Pain and Suffering!

So Wills - what's your prediction for the competition?

Hope to see ya there!

You never know if you've gone too far..... Until you go too far!

The title for this post came to mind as I was hesitating hitting the "Post" button on a Facebook post containing the link to my latest Discovery post -  a personal expose' on "Talking Dirty".

But it brings to mind several life circumstances and events and the general perspective of how I am and how I want to live my life.

People who play it safe in life, who keep their self-humoring comments to themselves, who don't say  something for risk of it being taken the wrong way, comedians or commentators who keep to the safe subject matter, CrossFit athletes who always properly pace themselves or "scale down" their workouts to weights they know they can handle....

Cannot identify or experience the practice or reality of taking things too far.

Red-lining, going over the edge of the acceptable and the attainable, saying or doing that which garners crowd appreciation vs raised eyebrows and a turn to the back.

What are Limits?  What are appropriate boundaries?  How do you know what the Limits are until you violate them?

Like an Olympic Downhill Racer going for Gold - sometimes you have to take your own Performance beyond your Practice.

You have to reach for something that is beyond reach.

Where you know the Risk of Failing is greater than the Reward of Success.

Yeah - like another recent post explains, I do tend to take things to Extremes....

It's a Natural Tendency for me but it's my little feeble attempt at making my mark on the World.

I don't want to be thought of as someone who plays it safe, who always does the Right thing.

I also don't want to be known as Reckless, but to approach Life with an Intent and Intensity that makes the People around me take notice and perhaps think -

I don't want to be like that guy.

He takes things too far.

Because I guess, in the end analysis....

Too far is the wrong place for most people -

And the Right Place for Me!

Talk Dirty to Me - A Discussion of the Language of Lovemaking... or Fucking

Whewwww.... This is not a subject I have ever written about nor do I necessarily feel comfortable writing about it.

It is a subject matter that is likely considered taboo by many, distasteful by more and is a literary landscape filled with landmines, snares, traps and tripping hazards.

Which is part of the reason I want to talk about it.

Because there are Risks involved...

But the Rewards of Discussion, Understanding and Practice are much greater.

As I have often done with past posts of questionable or potentially controversial title and subject matter, let me begin with a list of qualifications, conditions and disclaimers:
  • Assume that the "material", experiences and specific information I convey in this post were obtained over the last 35 years of my active sexual life, and not necessarily attributable or applicable to any one person, persons, experiences or time frames.
  • There is no attempt or forethought to Demote, Denigrate, Damage or Diminish anyone, any relationship or any encounter I have had with the content of this post.  This is a Discussion, which is the whole topic or theme of this post - the Art, Science or Affliction (however you view it) of Talking Dirty.
  • I am ABSOLUTELY NOT any inkling of an Expert on the subject matter of Sex, Having Sex or Talking about Sex, having probably less Sex to this point in my Life than is healthy, reasonable or proper for any self-respecting 55 year old man.
Which is maybe why I want to talk about it.

After all, this whole blog is about Discovery and Self-Discovery and I continue to learn and grow and experience and Discover things about myself and others in the name, discussion and acts of Lovemaking.

Or Fucking - if you prefer to use that Word.

See?  Now that's a perfect example right there.

Why is it so unacceptable to say the word "Fucking" in place of Lovemaking....

Or to talk about Fucking.

Ok...Ok, I get it - Women are all into Intimacy and Men are all into Fucking - right?

Whoa there Nelly - Not so Fast - is that really true?

Let's talk about this - See what I mean?

We're opening up Communication about Sex right there.

And that's what it's all about - and what this post is all about.

Sorry - Let's get back on track here.

So what's the difference between Lovemaking and Fucking?

Is Lovemaking something you do with someone you Love and Fucking something reserved for someone you have a more casual or no emotional attachment to?

I don't know the answer to that except to say or relate that there have been many occasions where the path and process of having sex / lovemaking / fucking began in a very gentle, emotional and intimate way that, in my mind and body, was beautiful Lovemaking, and then progressed to a very physical, animal-like, almost workout activity that I could only describe as hardcore Fucking and then led itself back to a period of resolution and intimacy of Lovemaking.

So maybe for me and my experiences, it's not so much about one or the other but a sexual journey that passes through the Lands of Lovemaking and Fucking in the same trip.  How's that for a compromise on the subject matter?

I'm off track again - I'm talking about the Act and I'm supposed to be talking about the Talking.

So "Talking Dirty" is something reserved for the bedroom - right?

For me and someone I want to be with - Absolutely NOT!

Let me relate a few examples of what I'm talking about for illustration.

I met this lady one night and right off the bat, she wanted to talk about her body - which was pretty incredible by the way - so I was good with that Introductory Subject Matter.

And she says - "I don't know - I think my ass is too big - what do you think?"

Well - first off guys, if your wife or your girlfriend or your date or this lady you just met, asks you this, you better Man Up, and say and do the right thing.

What did I do?

In this case, I think you gotta look at the Message of the Market - this lady was maybe a little lonely and wanted some Manly attention.

And despite her very direct and short request for it, she probably wanted more than a cursory "Oh - your ass is fine" response.

Being the Southern Gentleman that I am and realizing this was a situation that required a little personal examination, I took her hand and spun her around slowly to where I could get a really close look at her ass and asked "May I?"

"May You What?" she asked quickly realizing that we were standing out on a street in downtown Santa Fe with infrequent people walking by and probably wondering where I was going with this?

Aaaah - there's one part of "Talking Dirty".  Be careful of what you wish for cause you may get it - right?

The Target of your Talk may make you the Target of Theirs.

Which is a progression from "Dirty Talking" to "Dirty Communication".

To which I say - Bring it!

"May I feel your Ass?" was my response to her What What?

And the ensuing Ass Exam yielded my final response to the initial inquiry -

"Your Ass is Perfect - I wouldn't change a thing."

Having got my approval on the lower half of her anatomy, the lady quickly continued with -

"But my boobs are kinda small. I've considered getting a boob job but I hear that it messes up the sensitivity of your nipples....

And I have very sensitive nipples."

OK Folks - I'm gonna tell you right here and right now that this lady was talking my language because I am an Ass and Tit guy.

And this lady had them both.

I did not agree with her that her tits were small because they weren't.  And I told her that.

I very intentionally looked at her breasts and just said -

"Ma'am - your breasts look just the right size to me.  They would feel my hand and a hard nipple in my mouth is hard to beat".

Which she seemed to be satisfied with. Then and Later.

So what's the point of this little declaration of "Dirty Talk" between me and this lady?

I mean it wasn't like we were gonna throw down over a mailbox right there on San Francisco street.

I guess the point is that it answered a lot of questions and maybe set some precedents for both of us for things to come....Hmmm - interesting phrasing there.

For me, if / when, it came to the point of actually Walking the Talk or Fucking the Talk or however you want to put it, I had several data points to consider and follow through on (Oh boy - there's the Engineer in me coming out again!) - Ok - let's just call them the Action Items of Lovemaking.

It's kind of like foreplay.

Dirty Talk done before the Dirty Walk kinda gets you into that Anticipation mode where Fantasy and Visualization combine and have you doing all these things in your mind with that other person before you do them with your bodies.  It's what high level athletes are trained to do before the Big Event and I can't think of a Bigger Event for me than making love with a woman.

It was obvious to me that this lady worked on her body and had a lot of self-discipline in its upkeep and she wanted to be recognized and complemented for that.

I mean - come on guys - you know how women are.... they're insecure about this and want to be assured about that - especially when they're naked and laying right next to you or sitting up on top of you.

So just fucking do that while you are fucking them or they are fucking you or you are fucking together or whatever.  Is that enough fucking for one sentence?

"Oh my God - you feel so good - you are so beautiful - I love the way you move your ass. You are fucking me so good.  Thank you".

That one sentence conveys a lot of information to the woman.

I mean - if you are invoking the name of the Heavenly Father while you are fucking someone (Geez - this is blasphemy - I'm gonna go to hell for just putting the words "Heavenly Father" and fucking in the same sentence), then it's got to be pretty good.  So it's important your partner know that.

"You feel so good" means 2 things in my mind and hopefully is conveyed in her mind and body,

"I like the way your body feels" which is a little more general AND "I love the way your Pussy feels on my Dick" which is a very specific WOW for the WOMAN to hear.

"So how does it feel in there?" is her quick follow-up question....

"Wet, Warm and Inviting - like I wanna stay there forever" is one good response.

I mean - this is real Pillow Talk right folks?

It is a conversation you have with your Sexual Partner while you are having sex - if they are so inclined.

I had a lady tell me - "I love the way you talk dirty to me.  Can you teach me that?"

To which I responded beginning with a question -

"Is it really Dirty Talk or just a conversation between lovers about how they feel, what they want, what feels good to them and to provide specific instructions for their partner and what they are thinking while making love?"

Which is the whole postulate for this post - right?

Back to the one sentence analysis and the intent and learnings from it.

"You are fucking me so good."

I mean I'm not gonna say that unless it's true.

Good fucking is an athletic event.  There is some physicality involved so if you have chosen your partner well, Grasshopper, there's gonna be some workout involved from the lady and from you.

That should be acknowledged AND appreciated.

Hell - the Women I've been with in Santa Fe were all older than me and I swear to you - they were like Olympic Gold Medal Athletes in the Finals of Fucking.

Simply saying "Thank you" to a woman who is doing her best to please you ups her sexual game and yours and your mutual enjoyment of it.

"Thank you for making such beautiful Love to me".

It feels great to experience that.  It feels great to say that while experiencing that.  It feels great for the Woman to hear that from you while experiencing that with you".

"So do you wanna be on top or do you want me on top?" she asked me.

Well that's an easy one for me to respond to for several reasons many of which are conveyed in the following response -

"I want you on top so I can see you better and I want your tits hanging down so I can lick your nipples while you're fucking me".

Hmmm - that's pretty specific. That's what I like and I want my Lover to know that.

I mean - I like it on top too - and will comply with requests like "I just want to feel the weight of your body on top of me", but with my bone to bone left shoulder, the grating and popping sound of it while I support myself for a little leverage might be heard over the sounds of lovemaking and could be an annoyance at best and a distraction at worst.

"I just wanna hear you say 'I want to Fuck You'" was a Dirty Talk request from one lady.

Sitting across the table from your sexual partner having coffee at Clafouti's at mid-morning and just leaning across the table with a discrete volume and tone and saying....

"I really enjoy being with you and I want to Fuck You" is a pretty good way of getting a mid-morning buzz besides the caffeine and laying down a pleasurable expectation for the evening or perhaps later that afternoon.

Wow - this whole post has been all over the Map of Appropriate and Inappropriate Behavior, Good and Bad Taste and Loving and Fucking and Talking about it.

Can't believe I even put pen to this and hopefully I didn't offend anyone in the process of this post but here it is - for better or for worse.

I guess I will just conclude with the following.

All I really wanna say Ladies is, I like it when you....

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Fuck How You Feel.... Lift Heavy Anyway!

Let me give you a quick set-up on the inspiration for this post title.

I was at Praxis - my preferred Daily Torture site - working my way through a long and varied workout having done a variety of pullups, pistols, snatches and squats and I had one little segment of the workout left -

2 - 400m sprints with a run-time rest period between the 2.

My favorite blonde Amazon (besides my daughter who this lady looks just like which is kinda freaky) was there at the Box displaying her own Strength and Kick-assedness.

In fact, when I was doing by back squats, which culminated with 3 sets of 5 with 245#, she complemented me on one of the sets saying....

"That was a good set... Yeah - 245# is my max".

That pretty much tells you something about this lady right there.

So anyway - I was bitching about the fact that I needed to do the 2 - 400m sprints and had pretty much resolved not to do them and had told my fair-haired Strong Woman the same.  In fact, I had gathered my workout shit together and was about to leave.

But then that nagging little fucker on my shoulder was whispering in my ear....

"You wimpy little crybaby.  Just quit your bitching and finish the workout Old Man".

So I gathered up what was left of my pride and rep'd out the 2 rounds of 400m, actually doing pretty good with 1:55 and 1:50 respectively, sprinting the last one in and then spending a minute or 2 hands on knees gasping for breath.

During which time, the Blonde Bombshell gives a little exhortation saying....

"Way to Go.  Way to finish the Workout.  Fuck How You Feel... Just Do It".

Of course, my head came up and between the gasps of oxygen deprivation, I panted "That would make a great blog post.  Thanks for the idea."

In the ensuing conversation on the topic, she added the "Lift Heavy Anyway" conclusion to what is now the title of this post giving it a "Workout Only" slant as opposed to just "Fuck How You Feel" which is obviously politically incorrect and pretty insensitive.

Or is it?

I remember conversations with my first wife that give me inspiration to explore this little avenue of emotion.

Many, many times in points of contention, I would hear the much used and abused following...

"You just don't understand my feelings."

Which, in Time and Retrospect, could be translated as...

"I can't Manipulate You into doing what I want You to do, so I'm gonna play the 'You don't respect my feelings' card".

And at the Time and in Retrospect, I wish I would have responded....

"Fuck Your Feelings.  I'm doing the best I can to make you happy and provide a stable and supportive environment for you and our child so just get over it".

Yeah I understand - Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.

And the Language of Life and Love is different for the 2 Planets.

But in the end analysis, after all the Falling in Love, Emotion, Fucking and Tender Heart shit is over and done,

Love is a Decision.

It's a Decision to compromise, sacrifice and to put yourself into a state of discomfort for the one you Love.

Love is Work....

And a Workout.

Guys - it's NOT sitting on the Couch watching the Game, while your Wife cleans up the kitchen or bathes the kids.

Gals - it's giving your Man that Blow Job even when you're tired and not because he deserves it but because that's the Language of Love for a guy.

Love is sprinting those last two 400m of the Workout even when you're done with this shit.

And showing up the next day to do it all over again.

Monday, November 6, 2017

Geez Wills - Why do you have to take Everything to Extreme?

Not really sure.... probably a shrink question.

It's kinda always been that way.

Part of it is a drive to do things right.

Back in the old days when I was growing up, it was a compliment to be called a "Perfectionist".

Because it meant you cared about what you did, about the results and outcome and the quality of workmanship.

Now it's a goddamn sign they hang around your neck in the Time of "If you can Name it, You can Tame it".

Psychiatrists, Counselors and Lazy Fuckers look at people like me who sweat the details and push the envelopes of Time and Performance and Thinking and throw out Catcalls like "OCD, ADD...."

To which I respond FU.

Yeah - I'm an Extremist and proud of it.

I'm getting ready for a little in-house competition at Praxis - - this coming Sunday, 11/12.

Incidentally I kinda like the URL "thepraxislab" like we're fucking experimenting on normal human beings to turn them into some kind of superhuman deviants.  Yeah I like that.  Extreme.

Here's some more Extreme shit from Praxis.

And part of that "getting ready" for the upcoming competition is practicing.... which is kinda what Praxis is all about.  Actually doing shit to get better.

Guess that's more of that Extreme shit.... practicing to get better.

Yeah ADD label throwing fuckers, take a bite out of my Extreme Ass.

So Monday's Workout was something like this...

My normal warmup -

Leg and Calf Stretches
Left Leg Calf Raises - 50 reps 2 sets - to try to get my left calf - the one that is attached below my Left Knee Replacement - up to speed with the God-given Right Knee and Calf.  Hmmm.... doing a CrossFit competition with a Fake Left Knee - Yep... more of that Extreme shit piled higher and deeper.
4" PVC pipe and LaCrosse Ball Active Release - showed a friend of mine this little ditty and she liked it.
3/4" PVC pipe shoulder mobility exercise
50 PVC Overhead Squats
50 Push-ups (thanks Rod and Crew for making sure I do them right with complete range of motion)
10 Ring Rows
10 Hanging Scapular Retractions
15 Hollow Position Strict Pullups

Yeah - Santa Fe Yoga Vegan people - that's my warmup.... Try that on for size on your no weightlifting "I'm gonna live forever", I can't see you when you turn sideways bodies.

Oh I'm sorry - did I denigrate.... Please forgive me.... NOT!

And the Extreme warmup continues.

3 rounds of shoulder work of 10 Reps of each arm with 5, 10 and 15# dumbbells of:

Front raises
Side raises
Rear raises

Then a buildup of weights for warmup for the Competition's 1st WOD with 20, 30, 40, 50# dumbbell.

Then a practice run for the 1st WOD.

Did 2 rounds of the:

11 one arm Snatches with a 50# dumbbell - 5 reps with the Left arm,  6 with the Right.

12 one arm Thrusters with a 50# dumbbell 6 and 6 on left and right respectively.

11 chest to bar pull-ups

With a 2 Minute hold of a 35# plate overhead between rounds 1 and 2 and after round 2.

Then bench press max practice.

Bar - 10 reps
95# - 10
135 - 10
185 - 6
205 - 5

205# for 5 reps suggests a 235 or 245# max which is pretty good for me after all the shoulder work and WOD 1 practice.

Yeah - all you Young, Strong and Chestless - the Old Man can put up some weight on the bench press so bring your A-game, your Bra and whatever else you need.

Tanned on the way home - Yes I tan so all you "Oh you're gonna get skin cancer" peeps can just hold your applause - I wanna look good, I don't care when I die - hopefully it will be before 70 so just STFU.....

 And then home and fixed a max out post workout meal.

Blackened pork chop and pan grilled Fuji Apple and sunflower honey bread with butter with condiments of honey mustard, Thai chili sauce and sour cream.

Bowl of homemade chicken soup with jasmine rice.

Bowl of stacked salad.

Creatine - protein drink.

Did I eat everything in the pic?

You fucking-A right I did.

Because there's this little thing that turns into a bigger thing - No I'm not talking about my dick - I'm talking about HYPERTROPHY!!

The Precept, Concept and Cornerstone of HYPERTROPHY is that you Lift Big and you Eat Big to Get Big!

Kind of Extreme - right?

Yeah - especially at 55.

Who wants to gain Lean Muscle Mass and get Bigger and Stronger at 55 years of age?

This Extreme Mother Fucker is raising both hands right now and saying "Sign me up Coach and put me in the Game!"

Will I eventually Crash and Burn in a Ball of Fire?

I sure as Hell Hope so.

Cause it damn sure beats Fading Away.


I guess - If the shoe fits wear it....

And I got 'em on both feet.

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Taking the High Road... And then the Low Road!

To and from Taos that is.

When I got up Saturday morning, I had to make a decision.

Take the Low Road to Albuquerque...

Or take the High Road to Taos.

I chose the High Road!

Which led me first to a tour of the Santuario de Chimayo.

Followed by a steep descent to the edge of Santa Cruz Lake in the Long Cool Lady in the Red Dress - Miss Stang -

and another beautiful Lady.

Yep - I'm always trying to see the other side.

Seeing the other side of the loop that is.

Like the Sunset reflected off the hood of Miss Stang on the Low Road from Taos.

Pretty good way to spend a....

Saturday in the Southwest!

Thursday, November 2, 2017

Ruminating on Rumi

I was talking with a friend of mine the other day who has become somewhat aware of me and the way I live my life and my perspectives on it and she said -

I am going to send you something I think you will find interesting.

Now, first off, let me say I am no Philosopher...

But I have my own Philosophy.

I shun the condition of Wisdom, realizing I will never be so afflicted.

I have put together my own way of dealing with Life based on my Life and realize while it works for me, it's not for everybody or even anybody.

And as I have disclosed several times, I am a Life Plagiarizer.

I look for and observe those that are Life Hacking (my son's term)

better than I am and try to learn from them.

While still realizing that What is Good for the Rest of the World is not necessarily Good for Wills....

However, every once in a while, I come across a Phellow Philospher that seems to have got it right.

Which is where my friend's contribution comes in.

She introduced me to....


Per usual, i.e. the Discovery theme of "Raw and Uncut", here is the info straight from the phone text of MLB -

Rumi - 13th-century Persian Sunni Muslim poet, jurist, Islamic scholar, theologian, and Sufi mystic.

So here's a cut and paste of a list of some of his one liners - it's long!

0. Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.

1. Raise your words, not voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.

2. Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.

3. You are the universe in ecstatic motion.

4. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.

5. Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because for those who love with their heart and soul there is no such thing as separation.

6. Wherever you are, and whatever you do, be in love.

7. The moons stays bright when it doesn't avoid the night.

8. You have to keep breaking your heart until it opens.

9. You think because you understand "one" you understand "two", because one and one make two. But you must also understand "and".

10. What hurts you, blesses you. Darkness is your candle.

11. Two there are who are never satisfied – the lover of the world and the lover of knowledge.

12. And you? When will you begin that long journey into yourself?

13. Suffering is a gift. In it is hidden mercy.

14. Ignore those that make you fearful and sad, that degrade you towards journey and death.

15. Dance, when you're broken open. Dance, if you've torn the bandage off. Dance in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance when you're perfectly free.

16. Lovers don't finally meet somewhere. They are in each other all along.

17. These pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them.

18. If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?

19. The wound is the place where the Light enters you.

20. Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames.

21. You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life?

22. What you seek is seeking you.

23. The cure for the pain, is in the pain.

24. Do not worry that your life is turning upside down. How do you know the side you are used to is better than the one to come?

25. Love is the bridge between you and everything.

26. Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing there is a field. I'll meet you there.

27. You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.

28. Is it really so that the one I love is everywhere?

29. Silence is the language of God, all else is poor translation.

30. Travel brings power and love back into your life.

31. Take someone who doesn't keep score, who's not looking to be richer, or afraid of losing, who has not the slightest interest even in his own personality: he's free.

32. Be melting snow. Wash yourself of yourself.

33. But listen to me. For one moment quit being sad. Hear blessings dropping their blossoms around you.

34. Respond to every call that excites your spirit.

35. If you ever say one prayer in a day, make it Thank You.

You were born with potential.
You were born with goodness and trust.
You were born with ideals and dreams.
You were born with greatness.
You were born with wings.
You are not meant for crawling, so don't.
You have wings.
Learn to use them and fly.

Enjoy, Wills.

And I have enjoyed MLB.... so Thank You.

And in the same vein of continued disclosure, here was my text response back to the Rumi one-liners.

Amazing. Enlightening. Ironic. 

Not that I am in any way comparing myself to such a Wise Man but so much of his philosophy is my philosophy. 

And incredible that so much of his philosophy embraces the concept of Pain and Suffering as the Gateway to Pleasure and Progress - 2, 10, 13, 17, 19, 23. 

And of course the reference to Dance as the Great Healer - 15. 

Perhaps the reason I like to dance so much. 

Thank you for sharing this with me. 

It will take a long time to absorb all this and thoughtfully consider all the effects and nuances. 

I like things and people that last and have an impact on my life. 

And finally.....

Something that caught my eye in the Wiki info on Rumi....

Rumi believed passionately in the use of music, poetry and dance as a path for reaching God. For Rumi, music helped devotees to focus their whole being on the divine and to do this so intensely that the soul was both destroyed and resurrected. It was from these ideas that the practice of whirling Dervishes developed into a ritual form. His teachings became the base for the order of the Mevlevi, which his son Sultan Walad organised. Rumi encouraged Sama, listening to music and turning or doing the sacred dance. In the Mevlevi tradition, samāʿ represents a mystical journey of spiritual ascent through mind and love to the Perfect One. In this journey, the seeker symbolically turns towards the truth, grows through love, abandons the ego, finds the truth and arrives at the Perfect. The seeker then returns from this spiritual journey, with greater maturity, to love and to be of service to the whole of creation without discrimination with regard to beliefs, races, classes and nations.

Damn - Who's that sound like?

It's hard to see when you're in the Spotlight

Not sure where this post is going.

I got the punchline but no joke.

But here goes anyway.

I was at a Halloween Party the other night and of course, there was a Costume Contest.

The Improvised Emcee was on stage in the process of surveying the audience for the final lineup of Winning Costume Candidates.

But the problem was the light was in his eyes...

So he couldn't see the audience.

He shaded his eyes with his hands and said....

"It's hard to see when you're in the Spotlight".

And I turned to my evening's companion and said -

"Wow - that would be a great title for a blog post".

So that was Life's Setup of Inspiration for this little expose' on illumination.

And what is the Life Lesson here?

I don't know - Some people probably thrive in the Spotlight.

I'm not one of them.

Every time I have found myself in it, it seems that the ramifications of that environment are pretty devastating and life correcting.

When you put yourself in the Spotlight, it's all about You.

All Eyes are on You.  You are the Center of Attention and Focus.

That's all well and good if you are an Actor or Musician or Orator with a Message to the Masses.

The problems with being in the Spotlight are:

Every little mistake you make is highlighted.  There is no hiding, no respite from the scrutiny of the audience.  You can be an Idol or an Idiot in the blink of an eye or in a missed verse.  You better be on your game or you go down in flames.

The second and potentially most important aspect of being in the Spotlight is that it blinds you to your audience and to the environment around you.

This has life connotations greater than one might imagine.

Being in the Spotlight has never worked for me because each time I have put myself on a Pedestal all I've succeeded in doing is falling from it and hurting myself.

I much prefer and am more successful at standing in the shadows in support of those that choose the Spotlight.

If being in the Spotlight is all about Self-Expression but you are Blinded by Your Own Light, then what's the point.