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Sunday, January 24, 2016

You were born 200 years too late.... Exploring the lives before and the life after.... You haven't lived until you've died.

Pretty interesting title..... and we'll get to this topic cause I have a lot to say.

But for the moment, let's shoot a Nutribullet straight through to my heart.

Which is basically where everything you eat goes eventually.

Banana, green beans, fuji apple, strawberries, blueberries, carrots, cilantro, basil, salt, vanilla extract, Creatine and Protein.

Looking for something different on the music side....

And came up with this....

Maybe it's time to change....

Gorgeous fucking song....

Hang on to this one.... it will have more meaning later in this post...

Midnight snack - Ground Turkey Breast tacos with Pear and Cilantro and mixed veggies.

Gotta relate a cool little experience I had yesterday.

No secret - the chronically degenerated arthritic left knee has taken a turn for the worse since the first of the year and has left me with a 2 hour battle every morning just to be able to get down the stairs and walk without a limp.

I've exhausted the ability of the Modern Medical Community to deal with a knee with no cartilage and bone spurs like a porcupine so I'm taking it to the next level....

Alternative Medicine.

Which is a big industry in Santa Fe.

So I went to my alternative medicine go to guy in Santa Fe - Dr Mavrick Lobe -
to get a Platelet Rich Plasma therapy injection for my left knee.

Had 2 injections done on my torn - 40% detached left Achilles Tendon last year and it worked wonders... instant pain relief and increased strength - and I haven't looked back from that injury.

Mav takes the 30cc of blood and puts it in the centrifuge to separate out the platelets and we go into a long consult about my left knee and some alternatives I was researching for left knee pain / regeneration / restoration of some level of activity:
  • THC elements with the high inducing components removed leaving just the anti-inflammatory, pain relieving components behind - usually administered in oral form with eye dropper.
  • Testosterone supplements - got some negative side effects but so does chronic pain.
  • HGH - Human Growth Hormone - everybody I've talked to and all the research I've done says this is the way to go..... but it's pretty cost prohibitive.
  • Vioxx - a wonder drug of pain reliever and anti-inflammatory that was marketed by Merck but taken off the market in the late 90s amidst massive class action lawsuits because it caused heart attacks.  Can't get it anymore.... kinda like what Dow's Singlets was to the common flu.
So in the process of talking about all this neat shit, I tell Mav that my Santa Fe orthopedic guy, Dr Bair, said he couldn't do anything with the knee.  I had also asked Dr Bair to drain the knee of excess fluid and he felt of the knee and said "Doesn't seem to be that much fluid there".  I knew that was bullshit cause I could feel how swollen the knee was and the internal pressure being caused by the excess fluid.

So - Mav and I got our heads together and decided to drain the knee.... pretty simple process.

Stick a 2-1/2" needle in the knee using a real time ultrasound image as a guide and draw some fluid off.

Mav says "Yeah - I'm figuring there's probably 18 - 24 cc in there".

So in goes the needle and I'm watching it on the ultrasound.

He takes off 16cc and unscrews the capsule from the needle head, screws in another one and keeps drawing.

The knee has been hurting cause it's been in a pretty stationary position for awhile and having a 2-1/2" needle stuck in it ain't helping.

So... here's a little history... I ain't real good with needles.... Had a cortisone injection in my left shoulder when I was 17.... and the doc did basically the same thing..... injected some cortisone, unscrewed the capsule, left the needle in my shoulder and I looked down at it and saw the blood running down my chest, he shoots a 2nd capsule in and about that time I check out of this world and fall off the gurney into the arms of a nurse and take her to the floor.

And I passed out one time in my early 20s giving blood.

With all the needles and painful procedures I've had done in the past 30 years, I thought I had conquered the whole needle thing.....

So's anyway.... 2 capsules later..... and Mav is still drawing fluid off..... like over 40cc now and the fucking knee feels like I got a hot knife sticking in it and I'm starting to squirm around a little bit and I'm chewing my gum and gritting my teeth and saying.... "Yeah, that fucker is really hurting now" and I'm starting to feel a little light headed.  Only I don't say anything to Mav cause I don't want to be a Whining Bitch especially in front of a Stud like Mav.....

So we finish drawing off the fluid - total of 46 cc - which is like the most he's ever taken out of a knee and in goes the platelets....

And out go the lights!

I open my eyes and a slightly concerned looking Mav says.....

"Hey - you Ok?  You passed out and you stopped breathing so I gave you CPR.  Was about to call 911 when you came to".

Aaaah..... so that deep dark hole I found myself in was.....

Me being Dead.


Well - the first thing I'm thinking is that Mav is exaggerating but then I look at his face and hear his rapid breathing and I'm thinking....

I don't think he's kidding.

I'm totally weak and nauseated and I'm hot and clammy..... yeah all those symptoms.

So I'm laying there for about 15 minutes trying to recover and I get some water and some ice packs from Mav....

And we take my pulse and blood pressure..... 52 and 95/60.... holy shit - that ain't good.

I finally get off the gurney and sit on an adjacent chair and the nausea is just overwhelming..... Hey Mav - how bout a bucket so I can puke?

Back on the gurney for another 15 - deep breathing - cause that's what you do when you're living as opposed to not breathing when you're dead.

2nd pulse and BP - 50 and 84/53.... Dammit - that's still not good.

So after about 30 mins, I get up and walk around and dare myself to fall down.... and go into the bathroom and splash some cold water on my face and neck and arms..... 

And look into the mirror..... Hey dude - not looking so good.

So I ask Mav - "You ever have that happen before?" and he says..... "I've had people pass out but never stop breathing."

Well - I can't recall stopping breathing myself.... so I guess that's a first for boffus.

We decide Mav is gonna drive me home.... but after another 15 mins pride and prejudice kicks in and I tell him.... I can make it home.

So I gingerly drive the Red Mare back to the condo..... collapse on the couch feeling very tired and weak and sleepy but afraid to go to sleep cause I'm afraid....

I won't wake up.

I text Mav and let him know I made it and he texts me back to check in in a couple of hours.

I know - what a Drama Queen.

So after laying on the couch a couple of hours, I get up and make me my favorite comfort food go to meal....

Grits and Eggs and Turkey Bacon - which I scarffed down like a Dead Man coming back to Life.

So what's up with this thing..... Who knows?  It was probably a combination of Pain, Low Blood Sugar and my whimpiness with needles.

Did I really stop breathing?  

Hell - I don't know - I wasn't there..... I mean I was there but I wasn't there.

When a guy like Mav says you stopped breathing, I don't question him, cause he's a stand-up no bullshit kind of guy.

So what's up with all this?

Well - it kinda ties in with a New Theme of Life I've been considering based upon recent conversations I've been having with a friend of mine from PIYO class.

This friend is very deep into the Spiritual World of past lives, parallel universes and extended and multiple dimensions.....

Yeah I know..... but hey you gotta keep an open mind and listen and learn and consider.

I've always felt like I was born 200 years too late..... or maybe 2 million years too late.

My friend's contention that these feelings and tendencies exhibited in this life are based on the spirit and memories of past lives.

Based on and in thoughtful consideration of this concept, I am convinced that, if this is true, that I existed in past lives as the following:
  • Cave Man or some Primordial Being - I love Fire, being outside, hunting, killing, surviving, existing alone.  I love meat - I love to eat with my hands - and have deep and primordial thoughts and images that I continuously suppress or push to the back of my mind.
  • Mountain Man in Western America in the 1820s - 1840s - for a lot of the same reasons listed above. Plus I was born on the Texas Gulf Coast and have always been drawn to the Mountains - love to hike, backpack, live off the land.
  • World War II combatant - probably a sniper - Love WWII and have read literally hundred of books on WWII and visualize myself in the scenes fighting for life.
  • Probably lived as a Black Man or a Woman in a prior life - have preferences and tendencies of both.
So I guess it's appropriate and timely that I had occasion to pass from this life into the portal that leads to the next life - whatever that next life is - even if it was only for a few seconds.

It's a journey not too many have been blessed enough to experience.

Is all this a bunch of bullshit?  Hell - I don't know.

One of my favorite life axioms is....

"That Last Breath was a Good One".

Love the guitar lead into this one and the lyrics.

If Life is Your Lover..... Give her one last kiss....

Before you die.

"Welcome Home"

You could've been all I wanted
But you weren't honest
Now get in the ground
You choked off the surest of favors
But if you really loved me
You would've endured my world

Well if you're just as I presumed
A whore in sheep's clothing
Fucking up all I do
And if so here we stop
Then never again
Will you see this in your life

Hang on to the glory at my right hand
Here laid to rest is our love ever longed
With truth on the shores of compassion
You seem to take premise to all of these songs

You stormed off to scar the armada
Like Jesus played martyr,
I'll drill through your hands
The stone for the curse you have blamed me
With love and devotion, I'll die as you sleep
But if you could just write me out
To neverless wonder... happy will I become
Be true that this is no option,
So with sin I condemn you
Demon play, demon out!

Hang on to the glory at my right hand
Here laid to rest is our love ever longed
With truth on the shores of compassion
You seem to take premise to all of these songs

One last kiss for you
One more wish to you
Please make up your mind girl...
I'd do anything for you
One last kiss for you
One more wish to you
Please make up your mind girl...
Before I hope you die

So what have I learned from this little experience....

Well it just reinforces the belief that I profess to others on almost a daily basis....

You can't take Life for Granted.

It is to be lived each day to it's fullest with an acceptance and belief....

That it can end on that last breath...

And the Hope and Expectation....

That you will pass on to the....

Next Life.

Just another day in a Life of.....


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