Having God riding with you can be a Challenge... But it can be funny at times...

So I mentioned that I'd tell you what happened on 7 Devils Road between Charleston Oregon and 101 north of Bandon Oregon. 

As you know God has been riding with me on this epic adventure of cycling the Pacific Coast from Seattle to San Diego. 

Being that He's part Spirit and all, He weighs almost nothing and seems comfortable straddling the tent, mat, 3-legged stool and 2 rear panniers on the back of my bike. 

Let's just say He's made himself comfortable back there. 

So me and God take off up 7 Devils Road. 

I full well knew, based on the name and the legend, I was going to have to pass by, take the abuse of and meet the tests of...

7 devils. 

So, first rattle out of the box, just past the first 2nd ascending curve...

The first devil emerges out of the trees on the side of the road and hollers at me...

"Who do you think you're kidding' Old Man! You can't do 7 Devils Road - Just save yourself the trouble and give up now."

God just leaned up behind me and said....

"Ignore him my son, you're doing fine..."

I thought I smelled something on God's breath and I looked back and the Guy had my right rear pannier open and had snagged my sampler bottle of Jose Cuervo and my last bowlful of Frank's Favorite pipe tobacco and was partaking of both. 

I started to say something but thought better of it. 

I mean - what are you supposed to say about something like that?

So we keep climbing and I'm grinding up this slope in my lowest gear ....

And just around this curve, devil #2 comes up from behind me and starts running besides the bike and says....

"Look at you.... You're pathetic.  I can run faster than you can pedal that bike!"

Man - I'm gasping for air so I don't even have a breath to respond but I do manage a glance back at God and He's turned around backwards on the rear panniers and pumping double birds at the little devil who's starting to lose ground behind me. 

'Bout that time God spins back around and faces me and says "Hah - Guess I showed that little ......"

I didn't say anything... Cause what do you say to God in a situation like that...

But I'm getting the feeling all hell's about to break loose (and I'm not cussing - I'm literally describing the situation). 

So I enter the zone of Devil #3...

And just about that time, this BA looking devil 

steps out on the side of the road and starts laughing and bellowing...

"Hah - Look at you Old Man - What do you think you're doing? You don't belong up here on 7 Devils Road.... You smoke too much... You drink too much.... You are not worthy and I shall destroy you!"

I guess God must've thought the devil was talking to Him cause He jumped off the back of the bike like Jack Flash and planted a front kick to the Devil's face a la Anderson Silva - Vitor Belfort - 

It knocked the horns right off the devil, he hit the ground out cold and dropped his pitchfork. 

God picked up the pitchfork, jumped back on the back of my bike and jabbed that pitchfork into my ass and hollered "CLIMB BITCH CLIMB!"

It scared me so bad I came off the seat like someone had just jabbed a pitchfork in my ass, downshifted 2 gears and punched the pedals so hard I was doing 16 mph up that 10% grade in about 2 seconds.... 

Accelerated so hard I threw God off the back of the bike and into the middle of the road. 

I looked back in terror knowing I now got devils and God mad at me and God is chasing me up the slope like that crazy guy in the devil suit in the Tour de France. 

I just punched the pedals even harder and didn't look back till 3 hills later and when I did God was standing there with his arms raised with that God awful pitchfork in one hand and his glowing robe streaming behind him looking like Moses parting the Red Sea.... And I can see the trees on each side of the road becoming walls of water falling in on me like Pharoah's army...

But I guess God had mercy on me cause nothing happened, but I didn't do the same for the rest of the devils... 

I was going so fast I didn't even see devils 4 - 6 and then ran slap dab over devil 7....

Sure enough I look up ahead and there's God with his thumb out hitching a ride....

So I pulled over and said...

"You know God - I don't know if it's such a great idea you riding with me cause you're kinda crazy."

God just smiled and said...

"That's why I'm riding with you."