Play that Paleo Song again Wills!

Happy Holidays out there Discovery people.

One of my favorite parts of the holidays is Great Food.

And as you all know, for me, Food is LOVE!

As I was telling a couple of good friends of mine in a text exchange earlier today, one of the best ways to Love Yourself and the Ones You Care Most about is to share Good Food with them!

So what is Good Food, to me??

Well - lemme show ya!

Ok. So it's been awhile since I've posted the results of a Paleo shopping trip and the prep for the meats and veggies I buy so here goes.

I got done with a wonderful Core Strength and More group exercise class run by Liz Prehm at Anytime Fitness on St Michaels in SFNM and had remembered a weekly Smith's ad on some T-bone steaks at $4.77 / lb and was feeling that need for maximum protein in the days ahead after the Body Busting Workout Liz put us through so I mosied over to the Smith's just down the Plaza from Anytime.

And what did I find?

Holy Mother of Mercy Cheap, Lean and Tasty Protein Batman!

Boneless Pork chops for $1.69 / lb.  That's 3.7# of Protein Goodness for $6.27!

Sign me up and call me Ready to Eat!

Aaah - there's the other Meat Lover's Delight in line with Carnivorous Intent!

$4.77 / lb T-Bones!

Wills - you Paleo MF'er - that's a Nice Cart!

Damn Straight - Practice what you Paleo Baby!

Whoa Whoa Whoa - that's not Paleo!

Hey Hey Hey - Fresh Breath and Dark Chocolate is important too!!

So enough bantering and bullshit - People taste my Meat and say - Hang on. That came out wrong.

Women taste my Meat and say..... Whoa there Wills - Wrong Post - You already wrote one on that subject...

Ok - People tastes what the Rock is Cooking and say - Damn that Steak tastes good!

How'd you do that?

Well - it's all in the preparation and the cooking method and it starts with the following:

Adolph's Seasoned Meat Tenderizer

Salt
Pepper

Mix of Curry Powder, Garam Masala, Allspice and Tarragon - all purchased from the bulk spice section of Sprout's.

Apply to the meat liberally in the order given above and then fork your meat.  There you go again Wills with the Sexual Innuendo.  

No - really - Fork the Meat - hard and a lot and on both sides (Ooh I like that!) - this does 2 things:

1. Drives all that good meat tenderizer and seasonings and spices down into the meat so it tenderizes and seasons the meat from the inside too.

2. Mechanically tenderizes the meat.

Here you can see the fork marks.... Ooh that's the way I like it - uh huh uh huh!

Sing it KC!

Oh my God, I used to love to watch Soul Train and the Solid Gold Dancers!  Remember that!!!

Damn - I miss Disco!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OM7zRfHG0no

So  - insert a pic here of a pork chop I seasoned and tenderized a couple of days ago and this is the way I cook my meat.

Smoking hot cast iron skillet.

This is about a 3/4" thick pork chop -

Rule of thumb for a medium steak is 1 min per 1/4" of thickness to get it to medium which would be 3 minutes on each side BUT....

This is pork and I want it medium well so I put 4-1/2 mins on each side.

And mind you this is a cast iron skillet on high heat - you can see the smoke coming off the pan as this pork chop is cooking.

Why?

Because I want to sear all those great seasonings onto the outside of the steak which creates this incredible tasty crust AND seals the meat from the outside so that it remains juicy and tender on the inside.

Capiche???? OR

You get it???

So while the Pork chop is cooking - Back to the steaks prep.

I've seasoned and forked both sides of the T-bones and put them in a plastic Tupperware type dish and will put a lid on these and into the fridge for a minimum of 24 hours before cooking.

That meat tenderizer (which is basically dehydrated papaya - Yep - meat tenderizer is the enzyme from the papaya!) will break down the connective tissue in the meat and make it that much tenderer.

Tenderer? Is that a Word and do you Swipe Left or Right???

Stay on Track Wills!

Same thing goes with that 3.7# of boneless pork chops.

Geez - my biceps have grown an inch just thinking about eating all this wonderful Protein.

Oh yeah - you can work out till you blow yourself up and if you don't eat enough Protein (minimum of 1g per # of bodyweight for people working out with any kind of intensity at least 3 times a week and Yes - Ladies - this includes YOU!!!), you're not gonna make much progress.

Based on my experience, I would break down progress in physical fitness (however you define that - I define it as lean muscle mass, i.e. not skinny fat, but lean, attractive and noticeable and notable muscle mass) being attributed to the following with the follow percentages:

• Diet and Nutrition - 60%
• Workout Program, Intensity, Duration and Frequency - 15%
• Rest and Recuperation -  Proper Sleep - 15%
• Stress Management, Schedule Control, Life Prioritization and Planning - 10%

Yep - What You Eat is the Majority Factor in Physical Fitness!

Nice!!!

Package and Refrigerate!

Back to cooking the Pork Chop.

Flip that Mutha and give it another 4-1/2 mins.

And NO! It's not burnt - that's the level of blackening you want of those wonderful spices on the outside!

So now, most importantly, let that pork chop rest at least 5 mins to finish cooking.

DO NOT CUT the meat until it has rested!

If you do, all that wonderful juice you have tried to keep in the meat will run out on the cutting board or plate.

So, in that 5 min resting period for the meat, let's get the vegetable and fruit medley going.

Red Bell Pepper, Jalapeno Pepper, Carrot Sticks will go in first because they take longer to cook!  

Zucchini will go next and then some cubed up fresh pineapple.

All the veggies are seasoned with Salt and Pepper and that wonderful Moroccan spice mix and the fresh cubed pineapple with Cinnamon before cooking.

3 mins on the pepps and carrots, then in goes the zucchini with a minute on each side of the slices.

Out they come and into a tupperware container where they are hit with a drizzle of balsamic and EVOO.

Then put a grill on the pineapple cubes.

Then throw everything back together in the skillet with some pre-cooked Basmati rice!

And there's the finished product garnished with fresh blueberries, almonds and fresh julienned basil and a dollop of sour cream in the middle.

Look at that pork chop - perfect medium well.

You can tear the meat with a fork!

And what goes better with a meal like that than fresh flowers.

From Smith's - "New Year's Shimmer"!!!

Why?

Cause that's the Way Wills Rolls!

Happy Holiday and Healthy and Delicious Eating Everyone!

From Discovery....

To YOU!!!

Be the Spark that Lights Another's Flame

This is gonna be a fun and different post.

Fun because it's an Optimistic and Positive type of Post as opposed to more Dark and Introspective.

And I'm gonna line this one up a little differently.  I'm gonna put the Cart before the Horse by giving you the Post Outline or Talking Points FIRST:

• Changed the title from ".... Lights Another's Fire" to ".... Lights Another's Flame" - Why?
• Compare or Discuss Past Experiences with "Being a Catalyst" vs "Being a Spark".
• Discuss the Different Areas / Situations of Experience where "Being a Spark" applied.
• Challenge or Entice People to Engage or Reveal themselves by "Throwing a Grenade in the Room" vs "Striking a Spark".
• Just because there's a Spark don't mean there's a Flame!

That oughta be enough to get started.  There I go revealing my Creative Writing techniques - OMG - an Outline?  Wills - I'm shocked - How dare you use basic Old School Writing Techniques and Procedures!

I know  - I know - How Gangsta of Me!

Rip this Script Wills and let the Dogs of Words loose!  

Ok - that didn't come out as Cool as it seemed in my Mind....

So originally - in the Selected Reader Selection Process where 11 readers selected their favorite "Hook" blog post titles or ideas from a list of 24, I had this post titled....

"Be the Spark that lights Another's Fire"

And, as I am apt to do - I thought about that.

What does it mean to Light a "Fire"?

Well - first of all the concept of "Fire" can be somewhat intimidating because "Fire" can have negative connotations like....

Holy Shit - there's a "Fire" - Get Out and Get Away and Run for your Lives!!!!

Fire can imply a Blaze or something that's Out of Control AND that Consumes and Destroys or at least can be Unmanageable and is often a result of Too Much Fuel or Too Much Stimulus or Too Much INFORMATION - Oh My Wills - You mean TMI or WMI???

Yeah - Yeah - Yeah - You get the Picture.

Whereas a Flame especially if it is the very first Manifestation or Result of a Spark or an Ember has its own unique Qualities and Characteristics.

It is Simple, Subtle, Basic and must be Protected and Nurtured from the Elements and Outside Influences - think Cupped Hands.

It is Personal and Particular to the Person and Persons involved with its Initiation and Receipt.

It is a Potential for or Beginning of a Fire but it is just a Flame.

Also - in another line of thinking - a Flame (think of a Stove top or Gas Burner) can be a Tool that is used as a Means to an End - like cooking a Meal - which for me, in and of itself, requires some thought, preparation and is nourishment to the Mind, Body and Spirit and is one of the ultimate expressions of....

Love.

A Blazing Fire is great when you're out in the Cold and the Wild but think about the effect when you are shivering, hands numb and shaking and you strike that match to a Tinder (No - Not the Swiping Tinder!) bundle and you see that first lick of Flame....

That's a whole different kind of Comfort that extends beyond Cold Hands and perhaps to a Cold Heart!

It's kind of Primal.

I strike Sparks all the Time in Conversations, Discussions and in Actions.

The Simplest Kind of Spark is a Genuine and Heartfelt Smile to a Stranger.

You would be Amazed at the Reactions I get at a grocery store or Walmart when your eye catches the eye of another person and you throw them a No Holds Barred Smile.

I gotta reveal something personal to you - People used to make fun of my Smile because my Mouth is so big and wide.

People called it a Joker Smile - from Batman Villain fame.

And I used to be self-conscious about it.  Yeah - we all have our little challenges.

It's funny - you change venues, lose a little weight, age a little bit, get a different attitude about life and all of a sudden....

You have a nice smile.

Maybe coming to Santa Fe from a life on the Gulf Coast of Texas was my Spark.

Anyway - back to the Smile at the Stranger at the Store.

I do this all the Time... most of the time it's spontaneous and sometimes it's calculated.

Regardless of the intent or extent, I would say 90% of the time my Joker Smile is received with an instantaneous comprehension of the Good Wills sent with it.....

And it is returned in Kind... and in Kindness.

Cause you see - that's the thing about a Spark.... sometimes it Back Fires on You but more often -

It Fires Back at You!

It comes back at You in a Good Way.  There's that Karma thing again.

Spark makes the Flame and Flame makes the Fire and Fire sucks in Oxygen and Life and feeds the Fire.

Kinda Weird and Cool...

Or Hot - all at the same time.

And like I said earlier, sometimes the Spark is a Conversation about God knows What....

Paleo Diet, Working Out, Knee Replacement, Music, Dancing, Life, Love, Sex, Clothes, Style, Lifestyle, Global Warming, God, other Higher Being, AstroGlide....

And something I say or something I do has an effect....

Plant a Seed
Strike a Spark
That Another
Reacts to
Responds to
Is revolted by
Is jolted by.

I used to call myself a Catalyst - a technical or chemistry term - for a component that initiates a reaction but doesn't become involved in the reaction itself.

That self-analysis and environmental action concept has not been well received by those I have extended it to in most cases maybe because it connotates or describes a situation where I am not physically or emotionally invested or affected.

I guess, in this case, I would take my Son's perspective and say "Fuck Intent - I'm Outcome Driven" (incidentally and ironically #7 on the Selected Reader Selection List of Discovery Blog topics), in the Sense that, it's NOThing about me and ALL about the other person and the effect on them - hopefully positive.

That's my Intent and hopefully the other person's Outcome.  There ya go Aaron - there's some content for your post!

I remember I was talking to a lady during a lunch break on a hike about 9 months ago.  I was eating one of my Paleo meals I had prepared that morning - Cast iron skillet grilled meat, veggies, fruit with some fresh basil, blueberries and almonds on the top with my special Curry Powder - Garam Masala - Allspice seasoning mix used in the cooking of it....

And I shared some with her.

"Oh that's so delicious. I'm gonna try cooking and eating like that".

Fast forward 6 months - and I see this lady again - and My God - she's like a lot less Woman than she used to be.

She comes up to me and says "Thank you so much for introducing me to the Paleo Diet.  I've been on it for 6 months and lost 25 lbs and feel better now than I ever have.  I would never have known about it if you wouldn't have shared your knowledge and practice of the Paleo diet and your meal with me."

What can I say?

Out goes a Spark - Back comes a Fire!

Sometimes you don't even know it - and it depends on the Individual that is recipient of the Spark what they do with it.

Maybe a Spark is a Good Deed or a Kind Word or some show of Support to a Friend in Need or a Stranger Indeed.

Like taking a Pot of Homemade Chicken Soup to a Sick Friend.

Holding a Woman you just met close to You on a Slow Dance and providing a Moment of Close Comfort in a Day or Life of Desertion.

Standing on the Top of a Mountain and raising your Arms over your head in Victory and shouting...
"Yo - Adrian - I did it" in your best Rocky impersonation while your hiking buddies just stand back and shake their head.

Maybe it's Dancing at the front of the dance floor by the band in your own little world concerned less with what People may think and more about losing yourself or finding yourself in the Music.

Taking a Friend to the Doctor, not because they need a ride, but just because you truly care about them.

Helping an Old Person to a table and into their chair.

Standing when your Lady leaves or comes back to the table.

Saying "Yes Ma'am and No Sir".

Treating People with Respect even when they Piss You Off.

Working out with Someone or introducing Someone to a Group Exercise Class when they want to start or resume an Exercise Program but just need a little help getting started.

Showing an Empty or Damaged Heart that Love never Dies.

Listening.

Walking the Talk even when you're tired of Walking.

And People who actually Know Me, which is a very small group, know I sometimes Strike a Spark in a Powder Magazine, i.e. "throw a grenade in the room" just to see how people will react or what they will say to the spark or topic presented.

"Fire for Effect" is a way of forcing people to assess where they are or what they stand for in Life's Fire.

Yeah - Sometimes a Spark is a Challenge.

"Get up off your ass - Quit feeling sorry for yourself - You've got One Life to Live - One Day at a Time - So Don't Waste a Day or a Minute!"

Let's go Dancing - Let's go have a Drink - Let's go Workout - Let's go Hiking - What do you think about this? - God, you're so Beautiful - Dude, You've Put on some Muscle. Well Done - How's your new job going?

Hell - just remembering someone's name from a first meeting a month ago and greeting them with...

"Hey ______, how are you?"

Yeah - remembering the name of a Stranger is a Spark.

Ramble - Ramble - Ramble.....

You done yet Wills?

I guess "Be the Spark" is kinda like being Johnny Appleseed.

Throw those sparks or seeds out as you go and just hope they grow!

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+13&version=NLT

“Listen! A farmer went out to plant some seeds. 4 As he scattered them across his field, some seeds fell on a footpath, and the birds came and ate them. 5 Other seeds fell on shallow soil with underlying rock. The seeds sprouted quickly because the soil was shallow. 6 But the plants soon wilted under the hot sun, and since they didn’t have deep roots, they died. 7 Other seeds fell among thorns that grew up and choked out the tender plants. 8 Still other seeds fell on fertile soil, and they produced a crop that was thirty, sixty, and even a hundred times as much as had been planted! 9 Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand.”

Hmmm....

Come to think of it - maybe it's less about the Spark and more about where the Spark lands.

Ok - I give, I'm done and actually a little cold SO...

Go ahead and throw a Spark my way and...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AdgUn-0DDFs

William - Party of One!

You can probably guess the Source of this little Ditty Title.

You and Your Party or Partner or Significant Other or Family enter a Restaurant and there's a wait so you put your name on the list and eventually you hear the Host-ess with the Most-est come over the PA with....

"So and So... Party of However Many"

Well - for me - being the One Man Band that is playing - the Hostess' announcement is usually....

"William - Party of One".

Ok - so I've written quite a bit about my "aloneness" but probably never really focused on it as a basis for an entire post.

Until now.

What's the best way to begin this little Story of Wills' One?

How about these 3 versions of U2's One!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftjEcrrf7r0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BgZ4ammawyI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFWPeVfWB9o

Back to the Future or the Here and Now - Where to Begin?

Probably at the beginning - which is usually a pretty good place to start - as opposed to the end and going backwards.

So - how did "William - Party of One" begin?

Let's go back about 55 years - 1962 - the year I was born and the year....

My Mom, Viola Miller, bought a set of 1962 World Book Encyclopedias and matching Dictionary set.

What's this have to do with the whole "Wills Alone" theme?

Be patient - I know - you want to know what time it is and I'm telling you how the watch works.

Well - just get used to it and STFU and....

Let me tell you a little story bout this Man named Wills
He didn't live in the Mountains or Beverly Hills
He grew up in the cow pastures and rice fields
Where he grew up hunting and killed
And planted and tilled.

Watching birds and all God's Creatures
Living in the Land and with the Land
And learning all its Features
His only Companions and Friends
The Meadowlark and the Owl Screecher.

Sitting on the step of the front door
As a child before reading
Opening his encyclopedia like a Crystal Ball
Turning the pages of his future without seeing
That every picture and every word
Was to the World so absurd.

That by Ten he was in
College without knowing
His Imagination and Knowledge growing
Beyond his years and despite his tears
No playing with peers
But working in fears
Of lack of money
Poverty they call it now.

He learned alone
Played alone
Worked alone
Grew up alone.

And they ask him now
Tell me Wills how
Did it come to be
That you're always alone
But never lonely?

Well now - there you have it - Life Imitates Art - or Art describes Life - right?

So yeah - for those not able to read the lines or in between the lines, I grew up in a rural, country environment at 3180 S. Major Drive (FM 364) in Beaumont, Texas.

There wasn't another kid my age for at least 2 miles for the first 6 years of my life.

I remember sitting on the front door step of my house at 3 maybe 4 years of age with a World Book Encyclopedia - I think there was like 20 books in the set from A - Z obviously - and just turning the pages and wondering what it said and looking at the pictures and getting up and going into my Mom and asking "Mom - what does this say?  What is this about?" and her telling me and then the images meant something and I committed what my Mom told me and what I saw to memory.

And my Mom reading to me every night Bible stories that were beautifully illustrated...

Abraham and Isaac, Joseph and his coat of many colors, Gideon and his 300, Ruth and Boaz.

And I couldn't wait till I could read - so I could understand all of these books for myself....

Because that's all I had as a Companion - my Bible Books, my Encyclopedias, and....

Nature.

Beyond the fence of my back yard was a section (640 acres - a square mile) of cow pasture and beyond that miles of rice fields with intermittent tree lines, ditches, irrigation canals, an occasional mini oil derrick / pumper and dirt and shale roads.  You can Google Earth it and still see that big cow pasture in the back - 55 years later!

Larger game like whitetail deer and feral hogs were not part of that landscape back then but are now.

Back then, it was small game and lots of birds - it was a fucking bird paradise - and at a very early age - I became an Ornithologist - a Birdwatcher.

Now let me throw this in right here - I grew up in an era and a community and culture where kids played outside and parents let them.

My Mother let me leave the yard alone - Ok - not alone - with my first dog,  Doggie (I know - original name - right?), and roam (and I do mean roam) the fields well away from my house with the only stipulation on distance being that I remain close enough to where I could hear my Mother's voice when she hollered for me....

"Will-Yummmmmmmmm!"

And I mean for a little woman (5'2") - she had the pipes of a Swiss Mountain Horn - I remember being on the other side of that big field - nearly a half a mile away and being able to hear my Mother's voice.

I would jump up off the ground where I had been belly crawling for 30 minutes to try to get close enough to a Meadowlark to catch it in my hands - and yes - I actually did it a couple of times.

http://www.audubon.org/field-guide/bird/eastern-meadowlark

Anyway - I would hear my Mother's voice and jump up and start running back to the house hollering in my wee little 6 year old voice...

"I hear you Mommy! I'm coming!".

I was John James Fucking Audubon -

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_James_Audubon

Or at least I thought I was!

I roamed the fields stalking dove and quail and shooting and killing them with my Benjamin Franklin 342 .22 caliber pellet gun that I got for my 7th Christmas....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufwT87af_UI

Yep - you heard it right - I was out roaming the fields with the equivalent of a 22 rifle hunting, stalking and harvesting game birds at the age of 7.  Actually I got my first gun - a Daisy BB rifle - at age 6.

I would come back with 4 or 5 doves by 9:00 am of a Sunday morning and pluck and gut and dress them and take them into my Mother who would proceed to make the Absolute Best Breakfast to this Day I have ever had...

Cast Iron Skillet Fried Dove
From Scratch Cat Head Biscuits - No Goddammit - there were no cat parts in the biscuits - this was what they were called because they were so big and fluffy they looked like a Cat Head!
Homemade Blackberry and Mayhaw Jelly
Creamy Southern Grits
Fried Eggs

And when I wasn't Hunting and Killing to Eat or raising home grown (they talk Organic now - I fucking lived it for the first 20 years of my Life) vegetables and fruit, I was out with a pencil and paper and sketching birds in their natural habitat.

And when I wasn't doing that, I was building Bird Feeders and elaborate Purple Martin Houses. Yeah - lots of people in Beaumont had Purple Martin houses in their back yard because they are the Most Organic Mosquito Killer there is known to Man!

http://www.audubon.org/field-guide/bird/purple-martin

How was I able to build all this shit?

Cause I got a jig saw (sabre saw) and skill saw when I was like 9 or 10 years old.

Can you imagine putting a power tool like this in the hands of a 9 year old these days?

Yeah I was a capable, independent, ingenuitive, ambitious little Fucker.

This looks very much like a Purple Martin house I made when I was 10 years old out of 3/4" plywood.  I think mine had 24 compartments and was like a 4-decker with a steeple "penthouse" at each end!

Starting to get the picture?

Anyway - One of my most treasured possessions is a Roger Tory Petersen "Field Guide to the Birds of Texas" that I got from my Sister when I was 10, which I still have.  I started a "Life List" of Texas birds observed in the Field which I continue to this day.

Notice I haven't mentioned playing with any other kids.

And for good reason - as I said earlier - there weren't any.  I didn't grow up in a subdivision where you went next door to play with Jimmy or Jane or where kids rode their bikes in the streets.

The closest kid to me was 2 miles away and his name was Jimmy Akers.

I do remember riding my Banana Seat bicycle the 2 miles to his house when I was 7 or 8 and playing with him but this was not an everyday occurrence.

Remember these??

So, again, my Friends were Books and Nature.

I was Alone....

And they kept me Company.

Actually not Bad Company and Company I still keep and treasure to this day.

I guess they were my Brother and Sister in Arms.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_VsvZmIWxY

Let's keep moving.

I did go to a Public Elementary School from 1st - 4th grade - Amelia Elementary.

But, I also grew up a devout Seventh-Day Adventist (courtesy of my Mother) which not many people know about me.

And let me just preface and qualify what is to follow with the following:

• I'm characterizing the SDA religion based on what I remember and what I experienced almost 50 years ago.
• There is no malice or forethought or attempt to criticize, denigrate or diminish the Seventh Day Adventist religion or any member or follower thereof.
• I am simply recounting what I remember through the eyes and experience of a child and adolescent.

There - I'm qualified - or at least I tried to qualify.

How would I describe being a Seventh Day Adventist as a kid from the perspective of an adult?

It is like a cross between the most devout Bible Banging Baptist and the strictest, most literal Orthodox Jew - a legalistic Nightmare for a kid - or at least this Kid.

First of all, the SDA's were the original "Health, Diet and Nutrition" Lifestyle Gurus - which is not a bad thing - unless it's taken to extremes - like everything else in Life.

They formed Post and Kellogg and were into and creating natural and organic healthy foods and diets in the 1840's way before anybody else.

They were one of the "original" vegetarians having formed "Vegetarian Food" companies that I remember being in the Commissary at the Beaumont SDA Church when I was a little Kid in the mid and late 60s.  They had Veggie Burgers in a can before they were the latest Hot and Trendy thing on the menu.

They follow Leviticus 22 to the T - 

Cloven footed animals only.

No scavengers.

No birds of prey.

No animals without skeletons - like oysters, shrimp, lobsters, etc.

No fish with skin - scales only...... yada yada yada....

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Leviticus+22

They observe the Sabbath (sounds Jewish - right?) just like the Jewish faith - from Friday sundown to Saturday sundown.

During that 24 hour period, you can't (or at least at that time in the 60s and 70s) play, watch TV, listen to secular music, see a movie....

Basically - you couldn't do anything of Pleasure - it was intended to be a 24 hour period or a Day of Worship where all efforts, attention, talk, everything was supposed to be about God and worship of God.

So - functionally - what that meant to a little kid like me was I couldn't play on Saturdays.  

Hell - I couldn't even watch cartoons or TV.

Or as an adolescent - Dance - Oh Holy Shit - Dancing as a Seventh Day Adventist was the Biggest Taboo ever!

Can you imagine me NOT DANCING?!*%$@!

When I first started dancing when I was like 15 - it was like this Incredible Spirit and Energy had been awakened inside me....

Or let out of a Tomb!

And - most importantly - I couldn't engage in any normal kid activities on Saturdays like being on a Baseball or Football team - or any group sport - because, obviously, practice and / or the games were almost always on Saturday.

So even if I wanted to be part of a group of Peers (or play like a normal kid with other kids), a lot of that opportunity was taken away from me by the administration and legalism of the Seventh Day Adventist religion.

You could, however, go on Nature Walks or be in Nature.

A-Haaaa!  I got my Out so I got In the Out or I got Out and got In it - the Great Outdoors that is.

Alone - just Me and My Dog and Nature.

So there ya go - Mo Data on the whole Alone thing!

Continuing the whole religion thing and how it relates to William - Party of One....

From 5th - 8th grade, my dear Mother (I ain't blaming her - I'm just telling you what happened) decided the best thing to do for me was to take me out of Public School and put me in a Seventh Day Adventist Church School.

So she took me out of a perfectly good Public School System where I had great experiences, great teachers and lots of classmates and put me into...

A church school where the total population of students for ALL of grades 1 - 8 was....

20!

Yep - you heard me right - the whole fucking school from grades 1 - 8 had 20 students - and there was never more than 4 including me in my grade.

Holy Deflated Social Interaction Batman!

There was good and bad in that situation as there is with all school situations but what I remember most about my experience with the Seventh Day Adventist Church School for those 4 years was 2 things:

• The incredible financial burden the monthly tuition was on my family - it probably wasn't that much in terms of absolute dollars - but when you're barely eaking out a living - anything extra is too much - and I remember my Dad having to take on 2 or 3 extra jobs to pay for my tuition and that of my sisters who also were sent off to a SDA High School Academy - Oh my sisters will say different - that they paid for every penny of their costs at Jefferson Academy but that's bullshit - I saw the fucking checks my Mother made out to good ole Jefferson Academy so I know better.
• The other thing was that the other kids in my class picked up, personified, perpetuated and persecuted me on many matters of the SDA legalism including what I ate and drank because most of them were vegetarians and I often brought sandwiches or whatever containing meat even though it was "clean" meat per Leviticus 22 and I brought drinks with caffeine like Dr Pepper and most SDA's eliminate caffeine from their diet.  The little fuckers were merciless in their ridicule of me.  I probably would have gotten less harassment in a class of 100 in public school than I would have that tiny, legalistic SDA hellhole I was in for 4 years.

So that didn't help the whole Alone thing much.

Yeah - I'm kinda feeling some Godsmack right now - like Fuck 'em All!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYjZK_6i37M

Continuing the Chronology....

I went back to Public School for High School at Forest Park High School which is now Westbrook.

And that was probably one of the best experiences of my life.

I kinda sprouted, blossomed and grew out of the One-Person Hole and became a Jack of All Trades of Socialization - Master of Being a Chameleon with all groups and types.

There were 4 distinct groups at Forest Park High School when I attended:

• Nerds / Geeks - the Brains and Intellectuals
• Jocks - Self explanatory
• Goat Ropers, Rednecks, ShitKickers - FFA (Future Farmers of America with their blue coats and FFA emblems), Hunters and Fishermen, etc.
• Jels or Jellyheads - the Dope Smokers

Guess what?

I was Friends with and hung out with ALL of them.

Why?

Because I was PART of ALL of them - except the Jels - I never smoked dope in high school or college.

But some of the Jels were crossovers - they played football or were hunters or whatever so I ran in their crowd too and was accepted.

Yeah - you heard me.

I had a 4.0 in High School so I was always challenging the Nerds and the Geeks and often had the best grades in class and beat their best players in the lunch Chess matches.

Starting at 14, I told my Mother - Fuck Church and Fuck the Seventh Day Adventists - I'm gonna do my own thing and run Track and Play Football... so I did.  So I was part and parcel to the Jocks.

Of course I was a Country Boy at Heart and in Function and Growing Up - so I fit right in with the Goat Roper crowd only I never chewed tobacco or dipped Skoal in high school or college.  And I took all the Rich Lawyer, Doctor and Dentist kids hunting on their fancy leases as like a personal guide cause their Daddies didn't have time to take their own kids cause they were too busy making money.

And it was funny - part of my acceptance in the World of the Jels is that I would never smoke a cigarette or a joint with them.  My steadfast and consistent resistance to their "conversion attempts and tactics" won their admiration, respect and acceptance into their little Club.

So yeah - I guess I kinda made up for a lot of childhood and prior years of lack of socialization in high school but I still maintained my Own Identity and Independence.

I was Everybody's Everything but I was...

Still My Own Thing.

Still Me.

My Die was already set - I was....

William - Party of One.

You are what you were when you were 7 - Right?

And what I was when I was 7 was this Kid running the Fields and reading World Book Encyclopedias!

Alone.

And despite what People Want You to Be.... all you can be is...

What You Are.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bmIeTtU1h3M

Fast Forward past Failing at Raising 2 Wives and Succeeding at Raising 2 kids (not sure there's a difference - how did I fail at one and succeed at the other?) - and here I am in...

Santa Fe.

And I am probably more "William - Party of One" now as a 55 year old than I was as a 5 year old.

Only now I probably have more of a choice.

I can choose to be Alone or choose to be with People.

And most of the time I choose to be - 

Alone.

Why?

I don't know - that's probably a Shrink question.

Maybe it's more of my Comfort Zone.... Maybe it's easier.... Probably less expensive.

Geez - everytime I've been "together" for a long time with a woman, it's cost me hundreds of thousands of dollars.

The other aspect of this whole William - Party of One thing that I haven't explored yet is kind of a Twist of Words imitating actual Life that I am apt to do and that is....

I am my own Party!

I know that sounds Weird, Egocentric and Whatever but really and truly I kind of entertain myself.

Probably cause that's what I used to have to do as a Kid.

I have a lot of Parties (People and Activities) going on in my head and they keep me challenged, entertained, laughing, crying and pretty much busy.

The few people that I have let into my Life, and who have been unfortunate enough to get a look see into this Wacky World of Wills, marvel at how much shit is going on inside that daring, demented, divided, divisive, balanced and imbalanced Mind of Mine.

I've had people (mainly women) say at a particular bar or dance place....

"I don't get it.  You come into (this place) alone, You dance alone, and You leave alone.  You don't seem to have a Girlfriend or anybody you hang out with.  That's kinda Weird - don't you think?"

Yeah - I guess it is - but you know what?

You gotta Be Yourself!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WC5FdFlUcl0

You gotta dance with who brung ya.

And Who brung me to this Dance of Life is....

William - Party of One!!!

And I kinda like his Company!

Whatcha Eating this Morning Wills???

5 Minute meal...

Thin cut pork chop with cranberry - raisin - walnut bread.

Building flavor and texture by layers.

Honey Mustard.

Fold the thin cut pork chop over to trap the melted Brie and do kind of a Philly Cheese steak thing a la Outback Willy.

Layer of Spicy Hummus.

Layer of thin cut tomato with EVOO and S & P.

Layer of diced avocado with another EVOO S & P treatment.

Claussen dill slices on the side with a few kalamata olive slices scattered about.

Too pretty to eat???

Naaaa!

Sonofabitch - that's Good.

May be one of the Best Open Faced Sandwiches I've ever made.

Can you say....

Food Discovery!!!

Death don't Scare Me.... It's Life that Scares Me!

Life and Death
Death and Life
One is My Lover
And One is My Wife.
I Love One
And Serve the Other
Knowing that
When they Meet
They will step over my Grave
And Embrace each Other.

Lots of ways to go on a post with this title, so, as usual, I'll just do a Rumbling, Tumbling, Stumbling and Fumbling down my Football Field of Life and see if we cross some sort of Goal Line and end up in the End Zone of Life together.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8yEvF4M-jU

Where's Chris Berman when you need him anyway?

Oh well I guess we'll just have to rely on the wisdom or lack thereof of this Humble Servant and Observer of Life - Yours Truly.

So here's a few Life and Death Bones to put some Meat on or to take Sustenance off of regarding Life and Death.

Death is Final and Predictable - its duration is instantaneous although, in some circumstances, somewhat drawn out.

It's Outcome is Final IMHO and not Negotiable, i.e. this Life and Death is it; that's all there is to it - when you're Dead, you're Dead.  Very counterculture in the Spiritual Afterlife setting of Santa Fe but, again, that's my take on it.

Death ALWAYS Wins.

Life is Uncertain and it's duration Undefined - determined always by its relation and interaction with Death.

It's Natural Energy-based tendency is to gravitate toward Chaos or Disorder aka the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics....

http://www.brighthubengineering.com/thermodynamics/4615-the-principle-of-increase-of-entropy/

 “An irreversible process always tends to take the isolated system to a state of greater disorder. An isolated system always tends to a state of greater entropy. So there is link between entropy and disorder. It may be roughly said that the entropy of a system is a measure of degree of molecular disorder existing in the system. When the heat is imparted to a system, the disorderly motion of the molecules increases and so the entropy of the system increases. The reverse occurs when the heat is removed from the system."

In Mathematical terms, the equation or definition of Entropy is the integral of the Change in Energy divided by Time.

Change in Entropy = Q / T

Bottom line and in Layman's Terms - We have to put a tremendous amount of energy into Life to keep it from going to Hell in a Handbasket.

See - you didn't even know your Life was subject to and governed by an Undeniable and Irreversible Law of Nature!

As I have told my Son and Daughter repeatedly since they were old enough to understand the subject matter and concept....

Life is Hard at Best and Really Hard, Discouraging and Disappointing at Worst.

From the very beginning of Socialization with others, we are challenged with -

Playing well with others
Being received graciously by others and extending that reciprocal graciousness
Trying to respect and develop our own character and growth and to recognize that in others...
Or the lack of it.
Which leads to a need for social and relational assessment and discernment.
In how we handle ourselves around others.
And how we allow others to handle themselves around us
i.e. How we let people treat us.

There are always mental, emotional, spiritual, physical, relational, vocational, etc. challenges for us to face and overcome.

I mean when I look back at the 55 years of my existence - probably 52 of it memorable - or should I say recallable - I marvel at how hard it's been.

And, frankly, I've had a pretty good and easy life compared to a lot of people.

ALL of the hardships I've faced have been created, sustained and fulfilled by ME!

Yep - "Shit Happens" did not happen with Me.

I made Shit Happen - Good Shit and Bad Shit.

As we get older, there is potentially or likely a collection of more Baggage and Bad Memories that Dot and Dash our Life's Morse Code that can unfortunately and negatively influence our Actions, Experiences in and Enjoyment of the Future.

And it takes Life Energy to overcome and deal with this.

At a Time, if you are my age or older, when Life Energy is beginning to ebb.

Think of it as a Salmon swimming against the Current in its last Life attempt to complete the Circle of Life and Death.

The Fast, Inevitable and Unrelenting Current of Life seeks to Detour and Destroy the Salmon's Basic Instinct to Survive, to Live and to fulfill its Ultimate Destiny....

The Sustaining and Prolonging of Life through the Passing of its Life to its Offspring.

Unfortunately, the majority, and I do mean like majority, of the Salmon, DON'T MAKE IT!

Take a look at this data from the following link page 11:

http://www.aquacase.org/learning_docs/Salmon-Survival-Activity-Packet_Jan-2016.pdf

Holy Shit - out of 2500 salmon, 2 made it to Spawning and ZERO Survived!

That's 0.08% of the Population of Salmon actually realized their Full Potential of Life and what did they get as a Reward????

Fucking DEATH!!!!

Which is probably as good a comparison of the Human Life Experience as you can get.

Very Few People actually Live Life to their Full Potential and actually realize and experience the joy of achieving that Full Life Potential.

I am relatively certain that those 2 Salmon, that made it to that quiet pool that was their birthing place and their final resting place, never considered or had any FEAR of Death in their Life's Journey.

They were simply acting on Instinct.

For us of the Human Persuasion, it's not that Simple.

Common or Uncommon Wisdom and many different Philosophies and Sources generally agree that there are 4 or 5 Stages in the Human Life.

Here's a few links to explore and explain those Life Stages:

http://www.planetofsuccess.com/blog/2016/the-four-stages-of-life/

https://www.thoughtco.com/stages-of-life-in-hinduism-1770068

https://www.learning-mind.com/stages-of-life-journey/

For the sake of this post and in presenting my own slant on this subject for the Purpose of this Post, here's my 4 Stages of Life:

• Awakening, Learning, Development: this is birth, infancy, childhood, adolescence and early adulthood, where we gain much of our Core Education and Foundation in terms of Formal Learning / Education and Development of Core Personality and Moral and Ethical Characteristics and Standards.
• Recognition and Resolve: this is the Period from Early Adulthood through Late Adulthood - age-wise probably mid 20's to mid 40's where we Recognize, Embrace and Challenge and are Challenged by the World around us and all that entails and encompasses including Matters of Relationships, Marriage, Family, Vocation, Physical Maturing and Peaking, Spiritual, etc. and Resolve to Make our Mark on the World or at least, attempt to make a Good Life (however we define that) based on what we know, experience and prioritize in this Phase of Life.
• Reckoning, Reflection and Sharing: probably mid 40s to early to mid 60s - a time in Life where Life is changing - Kids are leaving or have left the Nest, Work life / Career is winding down and there is Time and Experiences enough behind you to make an assessment or a reckoning of what you've done or not done with your life.  There is Time to Reflect on this and perhaps develop some perspective on it that might border on your personal concept of Wisdom and of course, the need or desire to share those learnings with people around you.
• Retirement, Rebirth, Recreation, Resignation, Receding and Final Resting - Death: For many, regrettably, this may be the first time in Life since Childhood since they've actually had the Time, Money and have taken the Opportunity to PLAY!  The Problem is that, also, for many, they simply don't have the Physical, Mental or Emotional Wherewithal to Play anymore.  Life has taken its toll on the Body, the Mind and the Attitude and Perspective and leaves them no more than Walking Zombies - my term for the Living Dead.  For others, which I continually witness, wonder at and wander with in Santa Fe, i.e., those that have preserved their bodies, minds and sanity, this is a Time where the Pursuit of New Adventures, Travel and Discovery is Met and perhaps Muted by the Reality of Aging.  The Want is there but the Wherewithal is not.

True to the Life Explanation of the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics and in the losing attempt to attain, maintain and sustain the Order of Life in the face of Impending and Inevitable Chaos...

Life Energy asymptotically approaches Zero which is the mathematical, literal and life ending phenomenon we all Know and eventually Experience as....

Death.

I have actually heard and had discussions with several people lately that have espoused the concept of...

"I'm not afraid of Death.  I've lived a Good Life".

And I share that precept and premonition.

I have actually set forth a path and defined period of remaining Life that is predicated on my past Life of Pain and Experience and perhaps an attempt to cheat Death it's Smug and Purposeful Observation of my imminent Physical, Mental and Emotional Decline.

I am 55 and still pretty much WAO (Wide Ass Open) physically, mentally and emotionally, however, in this Top Fuel Dragster metaphor of Life, parts and pieces of me are flying off going down the track in the quest of a 300+ mph sub-4 second finish.  Check out the John Force - Kenny Bernstein crash at the 1:00 minute mark on the video.... Epic, Tragic and kinda Representative of my Experience with those that try to Run with Me during this Final Drag Race of Life, i.e. in my Intensity and Wills to Win - I end up taking us Both Out!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hf7qV4GiZeg

I figure, based on this "I'd rather burn out or blow up instead of Fade Away" philosophy, I got 15 more years of what I call the Good Life left.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O1v_7T6p8U

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHshP9vcnDY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bOKsOveYD0

So - yeah - I definitely wanna check out of this Salmon Run before I'm 70.

I see the shock on the face of the few that I reveal this to especially given that many of the recipients of my Declaration of Life and Death are either approaching, on or are looking at the passing of the cusp of 70 years of age.

They attempt to console me by saying things like "Oh, you're gonna live way past that - look at you.  You take good care of yourself.  You're in great shape".

I kinda smile a little inside at these words of encouragement and just say "Well thanks.  I appreciate it.  Guess I'll just take one day at a time and see what happens".

When I'm really thinking, "You don't have a clue.... this Physicality is really all a facade.  I'm really broken up inside with a Fake Left Knee, 2 missing discs in my lower back, a left shoulder that grates and grinds in a no-cartilage socket, a right knee / leg that is crooked and painful and a myriad of other physical pains and deficiencies to boot."

Yeah - there's a reckoning to an attitude and application of Invincibility and maintaining an all-out Sprint in Life when you should be Jogging or Walking.

But that's OK - it's my Life and my Death to Make and to Meet.

I will likely skip or try to avoid the Final Phase of Life as defined above, choosing instead to Meet and Greet Death while I am still able to Five Finger Death Punch Him in the Face and hug him in an End of Life Embrace as we jump off Life's Cliff together.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v-snQbt9T8U

"Cradle To The Grave"

The blood that runs within my veins
(the blood that runs within my veins)
Keeps me from ever ending up the same
(ending up the same)

The fire that's pushing me on and on and on
(on and on and on)
To me it's everything and it makes me fucking strong

Love me or hate me
I walk alone

Been called a monster, called a demon, called a freak
(called a freak)
I'm not an idol, not an angel, not a saint
(I'm not a saint)

I walk alone, I always have, I'm not ashamed
(not ashamed)
A living nightmare from the cradle to the grave

The soul that lives within my chest
(the soul that lives within my chest)
Just won't allow me to turn out like the rest
(turn out like the rest)
This heart that's driving me on and on and on
(on and on and on)
Has the same vision and it keeps me fucking strong

Yeah - that Mother Fucker - Death - don't Scare Me.

It's that other Mother Fucker - Life - that Scares the Death out of Me.

He’s MetroSexual with a Deep East Texas Flair

Note:  This post was penned by a Guest Author.

Metrosexual may not be a word in your vocabulary so let’s start with definitions – there are many and it’s a fun read.

met·ro·sex·ual

 a young, urban, heterosexual male with liberal political views, an interest in fashion, and a refined sense of taste.

met·ro·sex·ual

 A new name for something quite old. Men with taste & style who know about fashion, art, and culture have always existed. In past centuries, these kinds of men were in the upper crust of society (more leisure time). Technology has enabled men with more leisure time, so less wealthy males can now fuss over their looks and aesthetics almost as much as women. An American Metrosexual is like your average European male. In France or Italy, men can be manly and work on cars and know about art and fashion at the same time. They are cool with that and don't need some special name for the less "masculine" side. In the U.S. we think men all have to be either dumb gorillas or homosexuals. There is some grey area! There is an emphasis on not being pretentious in America that itself becomes a kind of pretentiousness. Men who dabble in vanity or in lofty romantic concerns seem less like men when in fact, they are probably better lovers to women than their traditional counterpart. James Bond is very metro in a lot of ways. He aint no sissy but he has excellent taste.

You might be "metrosexual" if:

 You just can't walk past a Banana Republic or American Eagle store without making a purchase.

 You own 20 pairs of shoes, half a dozen pairs of sunglasses, just as many watches and you carry a man purse.

 You see a stylist instead of a barber, because barbers don't do highlights. You can make her lamb shanks and risotto for dinner and Eggs Benedict for breakfast... all from scratch.

 You only wear Calvin Klein boxer-briefs.

 You would never, ever own a pickup truck.

 You can't imagine a day without hair styling products.

 You'd rather drink wine than beer... but you'll find out what estate and vintage first.

 Despite being flattered (even proud) that gay guys hit on you, you still find the thought of  

actually getting intimate with another man truly repulsive.

"Some people think he's gay, but he's actually metrosexual."

met·ro·sex·ual 

Males who are concerned with their looks more than the average female. A metrosexual generally takes a significant amount of time in the bathroom "grooming" themselves before going out. They often get quite upset or even aggressive when their hair is touched, and refuse to go outside in the rain. Spiked bleached hair and tan skin is common among metrosexuals, but it is not necessary. A metrosexual can be gay, but they often are not.

metro-sexual

metrosexual is a modern enlightened, sort of renaissance man. Secure and confident, capable and cool, typically well-educated and stylish. Heterosexual with a twist, not gay by any means, but he probably has a few gay friends, Can easily be mistaken for gay by rednecks and jock types. The only straight guy in a fabric store or antique shop who is not being dragged there by a woman.

the men who actually watch Queer Eye for style tips

When a blind person thinks you're straight, and a deaf person thinks you're gay.

My grandma told me I look gay, but my sister told her I'm just metrosexual.

Metrosexual

A normally straight male who possesses qualities of a gay male without being attracted to men. A metro often appreciates the finer things in life and enjoys making himself look good; be it through styling his hair or wearing fashionable clothes.

Person 1: "Is he gay"

Person 2: "No, he does dress well, but he has a wife"

Person 1: "Oh, he must be metro then"

End of Definitions… Beginning of MetroSexual pics...

You get the idea.

If the shoes fit, wear them.

Some of these shoes fit, some don’t when we’re talking about Wills.

And that’s Who we’re talking about.

But Why are we talking about this?

Because being Metro in Santa Fe is a Shoe that doesn’t generally fit.  In an environment of retired folks, hikers, cyclists, East Coast transplants, West Coast transplants, mountain men and women, a Metro stands out.  Same Metro wouldn’t be noticed in Manhattan, DC, San Francisco, Miami, Dallas or Key Largo. 

There is a look in Santa Fe and it generally revolves around neutral colors, simple combinations, certain labels, and certain codes. Earth tones.  East Coast conservative dress thinking.  Except of course, for the Native American Culture, Spanish Culture, Mexican Culture, and other cultures mixing well in Santa Fe.  Birds of a feather like their flock to look like the flock. 

Because there aren’t many Metros in Santa Fe; if you’re one, you’re noticed!

And judged.

Because this particular Metro has a style all his own ---wears Color, has fun with Clothes, has Shoes to match, And a Car to match, he gets noticed.  Certainly observed.

And judged.  

Who gets to be a metrosexual and who doesn’t?

How does this come about and where does it come from?

Did your mother dress you?

When did you have a personal style? 

When did you care about how you look?

Do you care about how you look? 

Growing up in Texas…where it’s all bigger and better … and more colorful…could be a factor in the evolution of this particular metrosexual’s style.   We’re talking beaches, blue waters, sun and sand.  Beach umbrellas and beach balls.  Color. 

Color is exciting.  (Try to remember your first box of Crayons).

And Like Texas,

This metro has his own identity.

It’s an interpretation

It's an attitude.

It’s a presentation.

It’s a statement.

If you express with paints and a brush you’re an artist.

If you express with a violin you’re a musician.

If you express with food you’re a chef.

If you express with clothes and color and grooming and caring how you look, you’re a Metro! 

It’s an expression of enjoyment.

So what about birds of a feather?

For those who judge -

Why?

Just Enjoy!